why do i love you (like i do)

title:
date: Saturday, December 22, 2007
time:12/22/2007 12:04:00 AM

I hate crying, especially crying myself to sleep. It reminds me of the days when I was young and did that everyday. The days when I feel alone, helpless. It reminds me of everything that I was afriad would happen. Worse, it reminds me that I knew all these would happen. Crying was the only way I could stay sane. It was my only way out since I couldn't fall into self-denying state. Not that I would want to.

Today, I baked cookies. First time going into the kitchen and producing something which was not instant food. There was this jar of cookies which I specially put in a whole lot of non-chocolate cookies even though there was obviously more double chocolate ones. I always hated the fact that no matter what good things happen to me, there would ALWAYS be something bad that goes with it. Always.

I already knew the answer to Nicole's question the other time. Now? I'm perfectly sure of it.

a mistake/ top

title:
date: Friday, December 21, 2007
time:12/21/2007 01:06:00 AM

Maybe I already have the answer. Just that I deny its existance.

a mistake/ top

title: All my I needs
date: Monday, December 17, 2007
time:12/17/2007 01:55:00 AM

I need

- sleep
- time
- sleep
- food
- sleep
- excercise
- sleep
- cheney
- sleep
- sleep

Okay, I shall go to sleep. Later my dad complain I grown old again. I'm NOT old okay, I'm just MATURED. Whatever.

a mistake/ top

title: Interesting song
date: Saturday, December 15, 2007
time:12/15/2007 11:49:00 PM

看着你空洞的眼布满了无奈
在你心中还有没有我存在
混乱的思绪让我狼狈的逃开
无法想像没有你陪伴的爱

心痛的无法释怀我怎能如此依赖
依赖你给的温暖最后却成了伤害

我要的爱你不习惯只想永不分开
人还在徘徊心却已离开
我们只会不停的制造遗憾

你要的爱我在习惯让我们再重来
困难的现在能克服的未来
需要两个人的爱才能存在

看着你空洞的眼布满了无奈
在你心中还有没有我存在
混乱的思绪让我狼狈的逃开
无法想像没有你陪伴的爱

心痛的无法释怀我怎能如此依赖
依赖你给的温暖最后却成了伤害

我要的爱你不习惯只想永不分开
人还在徘徊心却已离开
我们只会不停的制造遗憾

你要的爱我在习惯让我们再重来
困难的现在能克服的未来
需要两个人的爱才能存在

我要的爱你不习惯只想永不分开
人还在徘徊心却已离开
我们只会不停的制造遗憾

你要的爱我在习惯让我们再重来
困难的现在能克服的未来
需要两个人的爱才能存在

a mistake/ top

title:
date:
time:12/15/2007 11:41:00 PM

Thought 1: A never-ending nightmare starts when you start to dream.

Thought 2: Start living in a facade, you're stuck.

Thought 3: It's hard being yourself, it's harder trying to be a substitute.

Thought 4: I just blogged.

Thought 5: I have no idea what I wanted to type about.

a mistake/ top

title:
date: Wednesday, December 05, 2007
time:12/05/2007 11:22:00 PM

当你确定你要离开我
我没有说什么就当做了自由
有好几次我都想挽留
哭求也没有用就当做是寂寞
只有我能明白她的温柔对你是种解脱
只想要告诉我谁是你的最爱
其实你很爱她对我的惩罚
说你没有想她是可怜我吧
我已没有借口只能放手
不敢奢求你说爱我
其实你很爱她她很温柔吗
其实你很想她就说出口吧
我已不想多说摀住耳朵
不想再次听到你说你很爱她

其实你很爱她对我的惩罚
说你没有想她是可怜我吧
我已没有借口只能放手
不敢奢求你说爱我
其实你很爱她她很温柔吗
其实你很想她就说出口吧
我已不想多说摀住耳朵
不想再次听到你说你很爱她

你很爱她

a mistake/ top